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Bill Watkins, Traveling Poet

~ Words For You, Just Ask

Bill Watkins, Traveling Poet

Category Archives: Love

Livingston

05 Saturday Nov 2016

Posted by Bill Watkins in Love, Peace, Poetry

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Livingston, Montana, Wales

I watch them litter in Los Angeles,
hear the illegal bombs detonate
every Summer, thug life calling it all
the Fourth of July—but you know:

War is war.

I look East, to where my people
came from, bumbling West.

Wales.

Home of crusty shores, green valleys,
wet and medium cloudy and blue
skies in my dreams only, ‘cause
I’ve never been.

London has plays, football and a dry
wit, the foundation of English
there among the crags of Scottish
Highland wind—

Hope dawns in an Irish Spring, sing-
songing an accent, speaking of a golf
links well-played by a guy named Padraig,
green as can be, smoky over water
to the sunshine of a well-struck fairway
wood against thunder.

Rains all the time until it doesn’t, the clouds
yawning fog away and the rainbow
spawns a son, Gold not waiting at its end
but beginning when an “American” tired
of hidden Kennedy’s and covered up
Cold War murder returns.

“Repatriation” sings out to the conscience
of a man beat around the links too many
times by alcoholic graft.

I seek a putter from the rough, couldn’t
be happier I can see around the bush—

My 400 years of servitude in “America” perhaps
passing like a fallen mountain breeze.

Winter descends on trash in Los Angeles,
and I—

I seek employment in Montana with friends:

River called “Elk” or “Yellowstone” by other names
as flowing.

Constant is God’s invitation to Glory.

But we only accept when ready—

When we’ve put in the work, amended the
idiot we were to bring out the man
or woman ever-seeking the child within on
paths East toward Heaven.

Reborn is the sinner at admitting fault.
Love beckons the other half in me
unexplored.

Come with me to Livingston, in words
only if necessary, we like to keep it small.

The town is a river, mountains and changing
weather. This is God’s country at the hip
of National Park presence.

A break for many, exposure to the land.

The Indians had it right all along, never
cursing—always blessing the land.

Without good words, hold tongues.

I go East to Livingston, if she’ll have me.

A year or two, then Wales. Home.

400 years later, Watkins returns…
if she’ll have me.

If she’ll have me.

Heddwch fy mhobl…

If she’ll have me!!!

I Am

27 Saturday Aug 2016

Posted by Bill Watkins in Life, Love, Poem, Poetry

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God, Peace, Serenity

Words fail.

Ask Borges. Or Shakespeare,
where a rose by any other name
would smell as sweet, Borges a writer
and philosopher who criticized
words as fictions.

We journey to childhood, advancing
this or that, trying to help having
experienced something.

We transfer what we know and experience
to others, try to help, use words—

Whatever we can to improve a world
that according to Lao Tzu:

cannot be improved.

Stop. Go. Love. Hate. Be you,
be truth. Be human, be all things
under the sun or rain to bend or
move with pain—

Be that rainbow after the rain, be the
sunshine filtering through Spring,
a bead of sweat from a good game.

Be alive.

Be dead, where sleep takes us away
hopefully when content with waking
life—we
did enough to feel peace of mind.

The “Devil” is a word, for me conjuring
total perfect evil, temptation, “sin” bringing
more words into a poem which celebrates
the absence of nothing, the need to need—

words failing time and again to say anything
the next generation can use, but still
they use us.

Trapped in words and freed by thought
we smile and return to innocence—if
for only a moment, because the complex
rhythm of words so juxtaposed on paper
or on stage—spoken against wind
through ears ring.

And the pulse shortens.

And we return to our child, the
Native American her home with
God and Nature, the Great Spirit
awakening when we decide to walk
instead of fly.

When we pray on grounds instead of
burning fuel from above.

When we accept the slow pace, as the
real pace, and see that we cannot
enjoy this thing if going too fast,
so hear a Jack Johnson record, slow
down everybody, dilly-dally with some
words, and
let’s pretend.

First Crush

24 Friday Apr 2015

Posted by Bill Watkins in Love

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Joy, Love, Peace

Waves crash, suns fall down,
when really—

It is Earth that moves.

It’s all relative, the first crushy feelings
grab some at five, some at ten,
some feel stunted and
don’t trust love…

So how on God’s Green is it to
be expressed?

First crush, first love, first
Wife—Proverbs said to after that
relationship look. Take care, it
is a blessed thing,

And if it should happen that a
child in your care is crushed,
lift them up, open them up,

And welcome the love out—

Even if you never got that chance
yourself!

Pay forward gifts you never got?

Powerful it is to let go our pain,
ease in morning, catch the light
playing with rain and clouds again,

The rainbow not unlike those
prime feelings.

Suffering ceases, a thought of peace;

To be with her or him—it!!

First crush—Love, surrender!!

First love, find it within, give it
still, even if over hills and seeming
so far away…

And whatever you do, if moments
continue to pass, that wave overhead
and for today out of reach:

Pass along what you have to teach,
encourage the young to be honest,
loving, and to marry from their souls.

Else our lives ring incomplete, Longfellow
had something there;

Standing in these cowardly walls, lacking rhyme.

We look ahead, call her bad—the first,
because we were bad, unwilling, unable.

Go back, and say hello, if this is so:

First crush, we all know…

Birthday Poem, 2014

19 Saturday Jul 2014

Posted by Bill Watkins in Alcohol, Alcoholics Anonymous, Alcoholism, America, Love, Poem, Poems, Poetry

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Joy, Love, Peace

“I am Born”

Love, sweet—soft from hard,
this life is life first, thought second.

Rene had it half-write, the songs I sing
I think you might, wanna…

Come closer to not be afraid, songs typed
before sung are not unlike

Ants to Raid, garbage disposals pumping
horses sunny shade, I am

Often when least-expected brave, a song
sung myself, Mom and Dad loved me

into Life.

I am born. Truth, justice and the American
lie is a golden hymn sung song-like by
hymners and dimmers, golden
Parachute-seekers, rain frolickers, the
Devil waiting in weeks of wings, months
of pain riled up in “rent-is-due” as you discard
on your shelves: all the things you “have to do.”

Turn around; there is no “have-to” worth doing
other than fighting for breath and being. I thought
therefore I was… nothing. I am, and so have
a duty to think—

There’s the rub; when I came out, I thought
poorly being left alone too much perhaps,
I picked up “alcohol,” a fiery substance—
And began to with it dance, ingest, why drink
pain when in pain, the explosion like rain
this is not the promised game, ads on TV
selling me this runaway train.

Get paid? Simple it is to cut-off
mid-sentence the dream we had when born:
instinct, no words, colors and shapes—
all of us all five senses, the sixth only
a wave on the horizon, the formulation
of purpose. Mine goes awry and actions
follow puke to toilette, the commercials
of mountain springs and chick-filled
parties another lie.

Alcohol begetting more alcohol, the
confusion grows into a large unfiltered,
estranged Booty-call.

She picks up; I don’t know what to say,
I’m never drunk enough to be who
I wanted to be—

I STOP. I am Reborn.

This time I come out screaming a different
scream, muffled by the age I’m more tame.
I experience the same set of feelings but
decide to make a change. I hire a Higher
Power to direct through prayer, the gift
is a weight-lifted, “I can see Clearly Now”

The rain, fallen, is with mist and sun a
sultry rainbow I cannot pretend away,
the songs of violence fading to colors’
irregular descent on barrels of fool’s gold.

The mist is real, there is always a grey
in silver lining, it is the wisdom of love
and experience that now says “look
twice before crossing” without being asked
or told to do so.

Our parents were right after all—not only in
traffic but in being loving enough to create
and try, and so the wisdom of ages says:

“Honor them.”

I am reborn again. My heavens it is four
o’clock a.m. Many operate on Roman
calendars but forget to double-check
the purpose in them—

I see the sharpness of Roman columns in the
blue of now; marching is the drum,
The follower another failure like me, but
isn’t it glorious to see the glory in
two walking with Thee?

The name is sacred, say it only in prayer
and High Song;

“Remember for it is the doom of men
that they forget.” Women too, look
at me looking at you. Whetted right, we
pull out our Bibles and fight, the Goliath
in us is tamed, the slingshot love,

David is alive—

I am born

“Lovers’ Dusk” by Arthur Davison Ficke

06 Thursday Mar 2014

Posted by Bill Watkins in Arthur Davison Ficke, Love, Poem, Poems, Poesia, Poetic Blog, Poetry

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Tags

Arthur Davison Ficke, Couples, Ficke, Joy, Love, Lovers, Peace, Poems, Poetry, Romance, Romantic, Romantic Poetry, Valentine's, Valentine's Day

lovers2

                          Lovers’ Dusk

    Spring fills the air today; with different sound
The whistles blow, out in the foggy bay;
There is a thawing in the sodden ground;
And flowers whose birth is still two months away
Send down the air premonitory ghosts
Of what shall be their odors.  As we lie
Here in the dusk of silence, all things lost
Seem phantoms of a winter soon to die.
Nothing is dead that had the power to live;
Nothing can end except what should not be;
Beauty, that far-sought April fugitive,
Comes home to those who trust felicity;
Moments that have the whole life to give
Pause thus by lovers’ couches, tenderly.

Pasadena Book Fair:

09 Sunday Feb 2014

Posted by Bill Watkins in Literature, Love

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Joy, Love, Peace

History’s Literary Ship

I’m living at a book fair in Pasadena,
or am I aboard a seafaring vessel, circa
1715?

Languages are spoken, some with
different accents, some completely
different from mine, I’m on a ship
of knowledge heading for history’s
proud preservation!!

Come back, go forward, take these
documents with you, they’re ours.
“Monuments Men” in theaters, our
preservers in cubicles of event centers,
buying and selling history, these books
remind us of… us!!

What it was, is like, the maps in color
printing presses abuzz through the ages,
men and women’s whole lives dedicated
for us… for us!!

So that we could remember, for it is like
Boorman’s Merlin said: “the doom of
men that they forget.”

Women? Delve in, I think it was Sims Reed,
some booth I saw by chance, a dance of
forgotten women poets. Unless…

Forgotten, unless! Here we are, show me
more the ladies could write!! It’s not, then,
that I’m a bad guy sourcing out inspiration
finding it in Shakespeare, Frost and Longfellow
only.

I’m a product of my age, so see what I see,
the ladies that wrote had a hard time
seeing the light, their work diminished in
the 1820’s, unless…

Unless!!

We dust them off, what’s more we print
and reprint, we see it on YouTube and
Wikipedia, but don’t forget!

Don’t forget!!

There was an original work once upon
a time. Go to your local book fairs
and shops, find the source, revel in history,

This glorious history sea fairing treasure
chest, this glimpse. Ah!

I rest

College Love

08 Saturday Feb 2014

Posted by Bill Watkins in Love, Poems

≈ Leave a comment

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Joy, Love, Peace

Wow, the spring of dreams, Freshman year

Spring quarter out of the blue, skating in
on roller skates, I’m not joking, she rolled
into my life!!

Kristin, so cute looking eight feet tall, riding
in rolling into art history class, unbelievable
like an EMF song. Life changes. You think you
know your direction and it changes.

The chase was on, she was an athlete too
I’d find out. By chance from art history where
I never spoke with her, we met again in
Environmental Studies 122. Sorry, we did not
meet there, I was shy, just admiring from afar.

Then that day, she icing shin splints from track
team running, me icing sore knees from volleyball
rolling. The training room hook-up, I said
“Hello.”

“Are you in ES-122?” “Yeah!” “Me too.” smile.
We were friends before we met, same age, both
from similar schools, at the same place same time
blonde and beachy and athletic and dreaming.

“Let’s meet before the midterm and study.” Okay,
my dream was on its way. I had never succeeded before
where girls or women are concerned, but after all
I had only been a man legally for about six months.

We studied, we laughed, we studied, we laughed.
I got something out of her hair one night at her
place, and the calling was for a kiss, but I could
not. I could not. I could not for the age old problem
afflicting many an alcoholic, many a child of
divorce, many a shy folks world-wide.

I lacked God, I lacked courage, my hope back then
to get drunk enough to tell a girl my feelings.

I could not tell Kristin until years and years later,
how I felt, and how I feel now.

She was perfect. I’m grateful for her, the
friendship we had the laughs—

Only regret I was not man enough
to take the chance

The Wife of My Youth

04 Tuesday Feb 2014

Posted by Bill Watkins in Biblical, Love, Valentine's Day

≈ Leave a comment

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Joy, Love, Peace

The wife of my youth from the first whistle comes;
Calling in the night, from rooms cold and silent,
out onto the dark bark… the chime of alarm;
Alarming isn’t it? The truth, the Sound, the One;

From Zero, to All—infinity; the wife of my youth.
Malachi: did he paradise find?
I did in A.A., where Jesus’ Day at a Time grew legs.
Like poems. Like whistles; how alike are waves…

Lives, lived paradise-bound. Lives lived to be lost—
the bark of the found, the smart truth of the hound.
What was the hope? That I could fate jump? Hate rid?
I cope with One because in Third Grade I met her;

She needed no thing. It was… Chely Wright was… It happened.

The first whistle in the air; the sound of care
her eyes; hair.
I’m done… Paradise Found.
A Dream un-raveled in Tao Te Ching.

Do nothing… And nothing does you. First Wife…
Love.

Beer Commercials

03 Monday Feb 2014

Posted by Bill Watkins in Alcohol, America, Beer, Love, Poems

≈ Leave a comment

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Joy, Love, Peace

Isn’t it great, the colors, the sights,

the sounds—the glamour.

Drink this and feel this, you can be this
happy too!!

I was a victim of beer commercials;
it wasn’t the only thing that got me,
but it sure didn’t stop me.

How many young people fall to their
pressure everyday?

This is why go out, write about it, spread
the word there’s another side to the
gulp gulp!

My anti-beer ads go like this: Fade in
on hospital rooms and prison cells, then
have sucking music accompany the POV
down the toilette where boys and girls
are puking their first drunk.

Now the sewers with other drunks and
puke, the sewer water heading for the
morgue.

Sirens and handcuffs, straight jackets
and padded walls, meds dispensed by
laughing nurses, back to you throwing
up your meds.

Words flash on the screen:

“All this because you didn’t learn to live
before your took your first drink of
alcohol.”

Alcoholic zombies walk graveyards and head
for the bars to re-fill their glasses, watch
sports on TV.

As they clink glasses with each other, grunting
and foaming at the mouth, the final words
on this 30-second spot fill the screen:

“Alcohol: killing and addicting people since
the beginning of temptation”

With that the bar and its patrons explode.

Personal Poem, Don’t Read This:)!!! ;)

01 Saturday Feb 2014

Posted by Bill Watkins in Dating, Love, Poems, Poetry, Romance

≈ Leave a comment

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Joy, Love, Peace

First Date

There’s a first for everything;
mine snuck up on me. I didn’t know it
was my first ever date until years after.

Why look back?

Some wonder, I’m sure. Some are content,
happy in now and either don’t need yesterday
or prefer not to look at it—

I love the past, in it are gaps; I fill them up
one at a time, like rhymes the nursery rhyme
crawling up and down the chimney—on time.

Dashing through the snow, she asked me about
the divorce. My parents apart, it seemed right
for her to comment. I was already closed up
by then.

First date, I was twelve, she thirteen, she was cute
her name Jen. What a sport, it all was possible
when my friend called said it’d be a double-
date, and by the way:

“Jen wants to go ‘just as friends.’”

Why for years I didn’t count it a date. But now
years have gone by and I’m so proud it was her,
lucky I was chosen, blessed.

Thank you, Jen, if you’re out there.

The happiness of first anythings is important
to me, the investment is made I hope God
to her much happiness brings!!

First date, a perfect couple of discomfort,
a bridge built, a harmony by me rejected,
prior to puberty and unable to see I could
not dance the dance and be the person
I wanted to be. So I write this against the
wind, looking for a pleasant breeze

First date

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