Hard Times Poem

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Hamstrung in the Winter
of my Pathless Wood

Colorless and vain I stretch
my legs into the horizon of
mistakes.

Gentle is the calling, hard the path
to ignore, “least resistance”
appealing to the Dude in me,
could I have a steak sandwich
without all the stringy fat and
upset stomachs?

The beer was bullshit, it turns out,
every bit of the olden days
looking up at lies and rays, adults
with their God-given right
to ignore paths and children,
ignore words, traps spiritual argument,
mixing not politics and religion,

just God with all the toxins I drank
to make fun of loss.

Doesn’t excuse breaking my computer
yesterday, typing this on a new
one, going further into debt,
that Frostian pathless wood all
bashing at my face.

To let go the adult, be the infant—
to remember to forget, to play
the game of surrender, to accept
loss in stride, to climb
up again like spring itself,
clawing into cold tearing sunlight
from rain, unless in Los Angeles,
torn already, all winter a
fake.

I am therefore I think, must
feel before I write, why
nothing good comes of good,
the woodless path, or pathless
wood—it all remembers.

Cut into the summer

“Emergence” by Sara Berkeley Tolchin

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Piano Beach1

It was there all along, great peace,
I wear it again, I turn around in it.

What changes inside when the spark lights,
the fizz of a match coming up,
candles growing their yellow robes.

Curled up cottonball alone and warm,
at sea, rowing sporadically,
it feels like shipwreck and being found,
it feels like round rings falling into round.

On Limantour beach
I pay for concealment with dollars of sand,
birds fly the razor breaks of the waves,
I can find what I placed in the dark
I can dive by the light of Venus.

I like where I am sitting now,
but at your door I got shy,
left after knocking lightly.
One day you might hold me

in your piano hands
life all arpeggios and resolving chords.

***

©Sara Berkeley, from Strawberry Thief (2005, Gallery Books)

A.A. Step 2 Poem:

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Step Two

To climb up without a ladder,
stepping into sweat. You are sorry
for your mistakes but wonder
is the climb back worth it…

We come to believe there is a path
back, a solution worth the work.
Open minds yield results, we sit still
and let the light enter—

The temptation is to go with people’s
flow, go here, go there, listen to
that man’s voice, another’s hot air,
before you get lost in expectation, stop
the game—

Slow it down, go home, read a book!

Sanity, a neighbor of gratitude, is restored
the moment you depend on God
not human power.

Put the money down, bet everything on
God and watch the peace roll in

You Learn to Care

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The silver spoon rusts, and caring
departs the farther we find ourselves
away from life.

Poverty is our oldest friend, it is the
state infants find themselves in—
need to need, day to day, all five
senses supercharged and alive,
You used to care!!

To get that back you have to go back,
or forward march if in April you
find winter breezes alerting you
to change for the better.

Bill Murray in his Groundhog Day
learned to care, unlearned his stance
learned on the outside looking in,
resentments formed early in childhood,
defenses raised against abuse.

Our best defenses become our worst
defects as they sit and fester, or worse
yet grow and mold over and over
the petri dish that is Time.

The dust settles for a moment in
hospitals, jail cells, homeless shelters
or repeated groundhog days…

It becomes clear we must change. Not
to something new but to something old:

Back to our childhood selves, the infant
that with five senses cared! Was alive
with every movement, curious,
hopeful, asking—honest.

We learned to care, and then the day
turns and we can start over, begin
to live the adult life with childhood
spirit—Congrats, if you see this

New Poem, 3/14/2014

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The Whirlwind

You wake up in the middle of it,
Grease is the word haven’t you
heard, trying to learn “cool” at
the same time as “nice”—

Which is greater?

Moving, shaking, the dance
begins your mind is aching from
the:

Dreams you have all alone in your
room, matched to the: cold reality
of all the things you can’t do.

Nothing way-out or indigestible
would be if something like a Higher
Power you could hire even at a young
age see;

Something goes on and on, and it’s hope—
and it lives between your room
and your path. Cool wants you
in his refrigerator, is lonely for your
food.

“Nice” is all around, seems too easy,
so you keep looking, sampling
misery like all the other flavors
at your local bar, fake ID’s checked
by fake boobies, all working out
at another local hangout: the gym.

The whirlwind whirls on and on with
hope, be careful not to lose sight of
will as you declare “self-doubt” at last
as your E.R. check-in diagnosis, a
mononucleosis of all those frozen
wishes trapped by cool in that Fridge.

We open up at last, one day, shake
the frost and enter the nice warm
rays of nice, decide to be nice is
the best dream, and something
universally we can do!

Warm now, calmed down, we know
how to play hard but also how to
sit down, read, write, relax—we smell
roses in the warmer air of care,
pass them along to others, reaching
back to Cool without getting burned,

We hope. We Hope

By Bill Watkins:)

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Ballads of Spring

All these songs, in love—yes!
It’s good. Young love, the power,
the potential…

I wouldn’t know I was drunk.

But I remember what I wanted,
and humbly hope you’ll get it, if
you are young enough to waver
between the waves of right and wrong,
law and breaking it.

If you think it may be no big deal
to fail, you run with the “cool” ones
(who are often sick), escape the truth,
those true feelings of wanting to
be with her.

Your life is incomplete, wading in
this wall of rhyme, Longfellow
reminding us: be a poet in the
strife, if not at least:

Be true, and live a really good
life.

If alone you try at this you will
fail utterly if you be like me:

You need a Higher Power now;
grab one even if only fifteen

“Black Light” by A. Van Jordan

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Black Light

Our body casts a shadow of one
Body under a black-bulb pulse
In your mother’s basement. Light, even

When it’s black, moves faster than
Youth or old age; it’s the constant in
Our lives. But I remember when

I thought your house—always ready for
A party, even during the week—
Was the fastest element in my life.

Toenails, lint, teeth,
Eyes—everything was holy
Under the glow. I suspect

Even my bones were ultraviolet
When we danced, which was always more
Of a grind than a dance.

Whether the song sung came
From Rick James or Barry White,
We called what we did in the coatroom

Dancing, too: My hands, infrared
Under your dress, but innocent: We
were only kids, after all.

I was 16 and you were a woman of 18.
Already, we knew how to answer each other
Without asking questions, how to satisfy by seeing

What nearly satisfied looked like
In each other’s faces. This all before
I ran out to sneak back into my mother’s

House in the middle of the night.
But, now, it’s eight years later,
You’re walking, it seems, so I offer

You a ride. And you look in and smile.
And when I see you I wonder
What would have happened

If we had stayed in touch. I have to get back
To work the next morning in DC,
A five-hour drive; it’s near dark

And I want to get on the road before night
Falls completely, but I stop anyway.
It’s been too many years.

And I mistake your gesture.
And then I realize you
Don’t really recognize me,

Until you back away and turn
On your heels.
Then a man with a Jheri curl

And a suit that looks like it’s woven
From fluorescent thread
Walks up and looks at me

Like I wasn’t born in this town,
And for the first time in my life,
I question it myself. He walks up as slow

And sure as any old player should on a Sunday night.
While walking away, you two exchange
Words. You don’t look back. But

We see each other in our heads—aglow,
Half-naked—under our black-bulb pulse
I your mother’s basement. Given a diadem

By th lucid night and the streetlamp’s
Torch, the man wearing the fluorescent
Suit casts a broad shadow

Like a spotlight into which you step.
Maybe he’s the reason we’re here tonight
Beneath these dim stars, casting

A light true enough…finally,
For us, after all these years, to see each other.

Cornelius Eady Poem, “Photo of Miles Davis at Lennies-on-the-Turnpike, 1968”

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Photo of Miles Davis at
Lennies-on-the-Turnpike, 1968
*******

New York grows
Slimmer
In his absence.
I suppose

You could also title this picture
Of Miles, his leathery
Squint, the grace
In his fingers a sliver of the stuff
You can’t get anymore,
As the rest of us wonder:
What was the name
Of the driver

Of that truck? And the rest
Of us sigh:
Death is one hell
Of a pickpocket.

“Surprise” by Anthony Cronin

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Surprise

Since we were told it we believe it’s true,
Or does as it’s intended. Birds eat worms,
The water flows downhill and aunts depart.
Sea heaves, sky rains and can be blue.
Always love cherishes and firelight warms.
That knocking sound you hear is juts your heart.

Nothing is angry long and all surprises
Are well provided for. The dog that died
Became a legend and then had its day.
Sooner or later someone realizes
That a mistake occurred and no one lied.
If it is said to be then that’s the way.

But soon when doors are opens hints are found
Of strange disorders that have no because.
In one room on the ceiling is a stain.
Someone is missing who should be around.
Some games are stopped by arbitrary laws
And an odd I does things it can’t explain.

Nothing is order now and no forecast
Can be depended on since what’s declared
To be may not be so and each face wears
A false expression. Yet the very last
Surprise of all still finds us unprepared:
Although we say I love you no one cares.

“Odysseus” by Padraic Fallon

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Odysseus

Last year’s decencies
Are the rags and reach-me-downs he’ll wear forever,
Knowing one day he’ll sober up inside them
Safe in wind and wife and limb,
Respected, of unimpeachable behaviour.

Meanwhile he goes forward
Magniloquently to himself; and, the fit on him,
Pushes his painful hobble to a dance,
Exposing in obscene wounds and dilapidation
The naked metre of the man.

His dog will die at sight of him,
His son want fool-proof, and his lady-wife
Deny his fingerprints; but he
With his talent for rehabilitation
Will be his own man soon, without ecstasy.